2014 Nobel Prize Part 7: You Say "Disaster", I Say "Opportunity"

Day 2: The Vasa Museum – Tuesday December 9, 2014

This is a “free day” for those of us in the entourage.  We have an official event tonight, but the daytime is open for us to be tourists, so that’s what we do.  Following the normal exquisite buffet breakfast, we are going to spend the late morning and early afternoon at The Vasa Museum.

No, we're not cold.  Not at all.  It was about 10 degrees F and we Californians aren't quite used to that.  The hats were all courtesy of Eileen's sister, who knitted them all as presents!

The Vasa Museum showcases….wait for it….the Vasa.  The Vasa was a warship built in 1628 by the Swedes, and it was intended to be THE expression of national power at a time when the Swedish Navy was pre-eminent in Northern Europe.  Yes, really.  They had a navy, and it kicked ass during most of the 17th century.

The Vasa had it all: specially-cast bronze cannons that made it one of the most heavily-armed ships in the world, ornate scrollwork and decorations designed to awe the world with Sweden’s glory, and full backing of the King.  Actually, it had the full meddling of the King, who kept ordering alterations (mostly to the armaments) that robbed the ship of something really important: stability.

The result?

On the day the ship was launched and as it was making the short 1400 yard trip from the drydock to the wet dock it turned over and sank.  Yep, couldn’t even make it a mile before it went down.  And YOU worry about getting that first scratch in the days and weeks after you get a new car?

The investigations that followed have a remarkably modern slant to them.  It was painfully obvious to everyone that the changes demanded by the king were objected to by the architect (who had the good sense to die almost immediately after the sinking) – so the architect couldn’t be blamed.  It also sounds like the Fleet Admiral raised warnings – but was too cowed by the Royal Presence that he failed to flat out refuse to let the ship sail.  So the Fleet Admiral couldn’t be blamed.  And, of course, NO ONE was going to blame the king.  So, in the end, no one was held accountable for this HUGE NATIONAL DISASTER  AND EMBARRASSMENT.

Fast forward 400 years, and someone discovers the dead ship in the bottom of the harbor, where it has been buried in so much silt that little to no oxygen is available.  What this means is that almost nothing has actually decayed.  In fact, over 90% of the original ship (along with the remains of the 15 people who died) are still in almost-mint condition.  In an unprecedented archaeological feat, the ship is salvaged and reassembled, and a special climate controlled building is built to house it: The Vasa Museum.

So that’s the background to our visit to the museum, which was about a 1 mile walk from our hotel on a brisk, cold morning.  The museum was an incredible experience!  The displays of recovered items are really well laid out and signposted, and there’s also a lot of material about the recovery and preservation processes that is really interesting.  The reassembled ship, of course, dominates the museum, and visitors can walk around the outside of it on multiple levels of the surrounding building.  From a tourist point of view this is definitely a Must See attraction for anyone visiting Stockholm.

Freezing outside, but tremendously climate-controlled inside.  The Vasa is one of the (and might be THE) largest preserved item in the world, and the building is filled with incredible technology to ensure that the absolute perfect conditions prevail.

Amusingly enough, while the museum doesn’t cover up the history of how the Vasa was built and ultimately sunk, they certainly don’t follow the “this was a national embarrassment” thread of the narrative.  Instead, the emphasis is on “aren’t we lucky that the Vasa was fortunate enough to sink in such a way as to preserve it for future generations?”

Even here, as tourists, there’s still a Nobel angle.  Back on the day that we checked into our hotel, one of the things we’d each received at the Nobel Desk along with everything else was a laminated “Key of Honour” card which provided us with free admission to a bunch of local museums and other attractions.  So we simply flashed our cards at the ticket desk and were given free admission to see the Vasa.

Our magic card, giving us free entry to about 30 different places during the period of the 2014 events (December 5-13).  Another item in our goodie bag, courtesy of the Nobel Committee.

Post-Vasa we made the chilly walk back to the hotel and then headed over to the Kungstradgarden (which actually has a lot of dots over various letters, but I’m too lazy to find out how to insert them).  This is a 3-4 block long park area just bordering the opera house.  We spent a few minutes watching families skating at the outdoor ice rink before going into Burger Bar Café (at the far end of the park) for lunch.  This was a funky, cozy little space and gave our young boys food that we knew would mesh with their palettes.

 From there we meandered back to the hotel (only about 2/10ths of a mile away, so easy) and relaxed a bit before getting dressed for our next “official” event.

What happens next?  Tune into the next episode by selecting another page from the "2014 Nobel" menu, above.  These instructions cheerfully supplied as a public service for those who haven't won a Nobel Prize.

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2014 Nobel Prize Part 6: That Ain't Muzak

Night 1: The Nobel Concert – Monday December 8, 2014

The concert afternoon began under threatening skies, which was an improvement over the earlier morning rain. As had been the case all week, six luxury buses were staged outside the Grand Hotel Stockholm to ferry guests to the destination. As each bus would fill up it would depart, to be replaced by the next bus in line. I think that they generally had all buses underway within 15 minutes. Everyone embarked in formal clothing (suits and ties for the men, dresses for the women), bundled up in jackets, overcoats, hats, gloves, etc.

The trip to the concert hall was very quick – under 10 minutes – and got us there about 60 minutes prior to the 7PM start time. It’s possible that there was a police escort, or we might have been waved through stop lights, but I’m not certain. Drop off was just outside the main concert hall steps, so we all ran up the steps and went right in, where our invitations (which included out seating assignments) and ID were quickly checked, then everyone left coats, scarves, and other outerwear at one of the cloakrooms. Many women – I assume locals – arrived in warm boots and changed into their nice shoes outside the cloakrooms, so there were a lot of women doing quick changes on benches just outside each cloakroom.

The Stockholm Concert Hall

All these cloakrooms surrounded the central lobby/hall of the concert hall, so there was lots of room to mill around for the 10-15 minutes we waited until the doors to the auditorium opened. We passed time talking with Daniel and Stef – Stef realized that she didn’t have appropriate shoes with her, so she’d been out shopping earlier that day at the really ritzy mall area (same neighborhood as the Concert Hall) and picked up some (very) reasonably priced boots.

Once the inside doors opened we trooped up the stairs to find “Door 16”. The concert hall has 4 levels – the Orchestra/floor, two similarly sized balconies ringing three sides of the main floor, and a fourth balcony with seating that frankly looked more like hockey press boxes than theater seating. We were directed up to the second of the two balconies and, as one usher looked at our assignment in order to direct us upward he commented “oh – those are good seats”. I figured that there probably wasn’t a bad seat in the house and made a comment to that effect.  He probably says that to everyone, I thought.

Well, it turns out they WERE good seats. Really good. Doors 16 through 18 led to the 3 sections at the back of the auditorium, directly facing the stage. Door 17 led to the most central section, which turned out to be the royal seats – unoccupied for the moment. So we sat in the section immediately to the right of the King and his party. The six seats of the front row of our section were occupied by 3 of the 11 Laureates (Weo, another Chem winner, and one of the Physics winners) and their spouses. I assume three more pairs were on the other side, and I’m guessing the other Laureates and families were in corresponding locations in the first balconies just below us. Immediately behind Sharon and Weo, in 3 rows of pairs, were Daniel and Stef, Eileen and Andrew, then Robert and me. I assume the pairs behind the others were also part of each Laureates families. Jeff and Lise were one section over to our right, along with other members of Weo’s party.

The orchestra meandered on to the stage until they were finally all seated, and the concertmaster coordinated the night’s first piece, Music to Tune By, before sitting down to a generally quiet concert hall. Through some unknown piece of stage management the percussionist started beating out a snare drum tattoo and everyone rose and turned to face the back of the hall – meaning everyone was looking up at the empty seats immediately next to us. At that point the King and Queen entered from Door 17, followed by others including the Crown Princess and husband and others who we couldn’t ID. I think their party totaled 16 people – perhaps 20. The orchestra then struck up some kind of anthem. They have both a National Anthem and some kind of “God Save the King” equivalent – not sure which one this was. At the end, the King sits which is the signal to the rest of us that we can do the same.

Cover from the concert program

The concert schedule.  The three performance were judged (in order) as "Meh", "Kill me now!", and "Wow - outstanding!"

The vocal soloist and guest conductor now entered. She is going to sing “The Letter Aria” from Eugene Onegin. As it happens, they are married to one another. The conductor’s bio suggests that he’s one of the hottest of the young breed – he might be the Boston Symphony’s new guy…don’t recall. Whatever he is, he’s from the school of expressive body movements and stick shaking that I don’t personally understand. Her aria was frankly unimpressive. I expected an opera soloist to be able to be heard above the orchestra, but her vocal power is frankly not what you’d expect.

That number over, she and conductor retreated and the orchestra did a very quick re-tune. The conductor re-entered with the trumpet soloist who was performing a modern piece. The only reason to learn the name of the piece would be in order to avoid ever hearing it again. I can’t be bothered, so I’ll simply call it Music to Crash Cars To. We are treated to a virtuoso trumpet performance of an otherwise awful piece of music.

At the end, the soloist and conductor beat a retreat, leaving the orchestra onstage. Again, through some national understanding of “how it works” that was mysterious to us, everyone turned to the back of the hall and stood up at once. After a few seconds pause, the royal party, led by K&Q, got up and exited their section. At that point, all the doors opened up and people began to file out – expect those of us using doors 16 and 18. We had to wait about 90 seconds before our doors opened, no doubt to allow time for the royal party to vacate the hallway and go somewhere private. Once our doors opened we exited into the hallway where tables bearing champagne were waiting for us. Sharon and Weo tried to cut around the corner to Door 15 to greet the rest of the party, but were not allowed to do so. Security didn’t want people “leaking” into or out of our area. So we all merrily sipped our champagne and swapped gossip for 20-25 minutes before re-entering and finding our seats again.

I don’t recall what preceded the second entry by the royals – I don’t think it was another drum tattoo. I think it may have simply been that the orchestra stood up as a signal to the rest of us. We finally all took our seats and the conductor came out. He said a few quick words along the lines of “honored to be part of this…music is important…etc.”, and then they launched into Beethoven’s Seventh Symphony, which was just excellent. Weo was particularly amazed – he’s able to compare with other performances he’s attended and mentioned that the interpretation we’d just heard included things he’d never heard before and it was without question the best rendition he’d ever experienced. High praise indeed.

So on that we all finally exited (with another round of “You first” for the royal party) and retrieved our things before re-embarking on the buses back to the hotel. If we’d been smart we would have skipped the buses and gone to find a restaurant by the concert hall. The choices closer to the hotel – already meager – were essentially non-existent by 10P on Monday night. We tried walking to an Italian restaurant with Daniel and Stef that claimed to be open until midnight, but that turned out to be for drinks only. Meal service had ended by the time we arrived. So our night ended with a late room service dinner and bed.

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2014 Nobel Prize Part 5: This Might Be On the Test

Day 1: The Nobel Lectures – Monday December 8, 2014

Waking up, I first took a look outside the window.

Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore!

This was shot around 9:30A.  The camera is making things look brighter than they actually were.  It wasn’t “dark” at 9:30A, but neither was it “bright”.  At this time of year, “daylight” occurred between about 9:30AM and 2:30PM.  It was definitely still dark around 8:30A, and it felt like night by about 3PM.

From there, we made our way down to the breakfast buffet.  Sadly, I never took pictures, but let me tell you: this ain’t your typical Holiday Inn/Best Western/Hilton Garden/Marriot Courtyard breakfast buffet.  No strange waffle machines, no steamer tray of powdered eggs, and no OJ or milk machines.  Nope, instead there were silver trays of meats, fishes, smoked meats and fishes, cheeses, fruits (including, of course, lingonberries), and other delicacies.  There were several loaves of different kinds of fresh-baked breads that you could hack hunks off of, along with fresh-baked muffins, scones, biscuits, and other starches.  There were crepes and pancakes.  There were made-to-order eggs.  There were various hot and cold cereal choices.  There were pitchers filled with fresh squeezed juices of various types, different milk coices, and several kinds of teas and coffees to pour.  I’m probably forgetting a bunch of stuff, but it was, you know, just your run-of-the-mill five-star hotel sort of buffet.  It was the best start to a morning you could ask for, and we got it every day!

The winners of the Nobel Prizes are officially required to present a public lecture in Sweden within 1 year of receiving the award.  In more modern times this lecture has long been scheduled as part of Nobel Week and that’s what’s happening this year.  The Physics, Chemistry, and Economics winners are all scheduled to present at Aula Magna, a lecture hall at Stockholm University.

Based on the info we had from the Nobel Desk, we knew that we could easily attend only those lectures that we wanted to.  In other words, buses were available to take us to and return us from the Chemistry lectures.  We certainly could have attended the Physics lecture (held earlier in the morning than Chemistry) or Economics (held after Chemistry) had we wished to.

Once inside Aula Magna we took our seats in a section reserved for guests of the winners and the head of the selection committee made a few quick introductory remarks.  He then introduced the first Chemistry Laureate (Heil) and ceded the stage to him.  Each Laureate had 30 minutes and it appears that this lecture is the most nerve-wracking event for all the winners.  Certainly in Weo’s case he had made it clear that the lecture was the milestone that he needed to get past before he felt he could really relax.  Weo followed Stefan, and Eric Betzig followed Weo.

There’s clearly an accepted format or set of conventions that defines how these lectures are structured in this day and age.  It seems that the norm these days is to try to lead the audience on a journey of what motivated you to undertake your work and use that as a way to also give credit to those that inspired you personally and/or professionally.  Along the way some actual science is discussed, but hopefully presented for the non-science professional.  Hell’s lecture was pretty tightly focused on himself and his work with almost nothing about what others may have done to inspire him.  Self-promoting would be a less kind description.  I honestly felt like I was hearing a sales presentation.  Both Weo and Eric were much better at making it clear that no scientist ever wins this award in a vacuum in which only the winner discovers things.  In other words, they were both more generous in crediting and thanking others.

By the way, Aula Magna is a STUNNINGLY gorgeous lecture hall, with tons of warm woods arranged in visually pleasing undulating waves.  It also has tremendous acoustics, which was proven by the 3 students high up in a spot-light platform on house right.  They were speaking in what they THOUGHT were low voices, but their comments (in Swedish, so unintelligible to us) were magnified all over the hall.  Audience members were continually craning their heads up and around to stare daggers at them, but they remained oblivious.  Finally, someone said “SSSSHHHHH” in Swedish (English translation: “SSSSHHHHH”) and they got the hint.

Later in the afternoon we had to walk over to a couple of different shops to have our (Doug, Robert, Andrew) final fittings for our formal wear for the Awards and Banquet.  Doug went to the same store as all the other men and my fitting was a quick affair.  We had to go to a different store for the boys.  Their fittings took a bit longer as kids are often caught between sizes and therefore it takes some time to find the right starting points for them from which tailored results will be delivered to our hotel later.  Ironically, when we finally get dressed on Wednesday we’ll discover with horror that what has been delivered to us is NOT what we had fitted for the boys – it is too small in both cases.  We’ll theorize that the two sons of Physics Laureate Nakamura, who are the same ages but smaller than as our boys, got our stuff and we got theirs.  (We’ll confirm this visually onstage Wednesday when we note that their two boys are wearing clothing much too large for them).  So the boys are sadly going to wear suits too small for them.  In Robert’s case it will be a close thing, indeed – he was not too far from ripping the seams out of his too-small shirt and coat.  (“Hulk angry at small suit!”)

The illuminated reindeer above are in a small park just across the street from the hotel and are something we passed as we walked over to the clothing stores.  To give a sense of what dark Swedish winter is like I’ll point out that this photo was taken about 3PM.

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2014 Nobel Prize Part 4: Let's Go Already!

Getting There: Sunday, December 7, 2014

We ended up flying on SAS, which is the national airline of Sweden.  This is the same airline which all the Laureates had used, and one that we could have booked via the assistance of Scanworld, the Nobel Committee’s travel partner.  Ultimately, I had ended up booking directly with SAS once I determined that Scanworld wasn’t offering any special rates to us.  

From San Francisco we flew to Arlanda International in Stockholm.  Total flight time was just over 13 hours, including the layover and plane change in Copenhagen.  I don’t recall much about our flight other than a vague memory of a dinner including some kind of dessert that included lingonberries, and a snack that featured reindeer sausage.  I believe that we were all impressed by the overall quality of the SAS experience, however.

The very first Nobel-related messaging we saw was at the airport, on our way to baggage claim.  There was signage everywhere welcoming arriving passengers to Nobel Week and also directly congratulating the Nobel Laureates.  

There was also a media campaign (which might have been Nobel Week-related, but may also simply have been the normal signage) consisting of large photos of famous Stockholm natives with the message "Welcome to MY hometown" on them.  Examples were Lasse Hallstrom ("Film Director"), Mats Sundin ("Ice Hockey Player"), and Ingrid Bergman ("Legend").  Yes, that was the description on her panel.  I wonder what kind of questions you get asked when you go to a job interview in hopes of being hired to be a Legend?  

Although we could have taken Arlanda Express (aka the regional metro system) from the airport to the vicinity of the hotel we instead opted for a taxi in order to get door-to-door service.  After a long flight through the night we wanted to keep things as simple as possible and limit the amount of lugging of luggage we had to do.  

Of course, Nobel Prize winners are assigned a car and driver throughout their stay in Sweden – a sexy black sedan with Nobel markings on the outside.  It might have actually been a Ford Crown Victoria:  

A sleek, reliable car that has exquisite details and handles well in corners

 This car should not be confused with Crown Princess Victoria of Sweden:

A sleek, reliable princess that has exquisite details and handles well in corners

An interesting side-note about CPV:  Until 1990, she was just Princess Victoria.  However, that year Sweden’s Parliament passed a new law that allowed the crown to pass to the King’s oldest child, NOT his oldest SON (who was younger than CPV).  So at age 13 she was suddenly leap-frogged over her brother as the heir-apparent.  I’d make a joke here, but the story turns (temporarily) sad.  The sudden change in status was extremely stressful for her and she developed anorexia.  She would later say that her life was so regimented that the only thing she felt like she had control over was what she ate – or binged and purged in her case.

To get her help her parents decided to remove her from the fishbowl of Sweden and sent her off to college in the US, where she would have comparative anonymity while going to school and receiving treatment.  One positive outcome was that she met and married her….wait for it…personal trainer.  So they guy in the royal box sitting next to her in uniform is actually a former trainer and gym owner.  (Weo mentioned that, during the Nobel Banquet, the conversation he heard between CPV and her sister was typical suburban soccer mom type stuff.)  To her credit she’s been very outspoken about her struggles in hopes that others can profit from her experiences.

Outside the Grand Hotel, on the light posts, were LED display screens displaying the Nobel Medal on an ever-changing background of colors.  Since it was already pitch black outside (at around 5PM) this was a really nice effect.  Had we arrived earlier we could have attended a reception for the four American winners that was being held at the American Embassy.  I'm sure every Ambassador dreams of the opportunity to make small talk with jet-lagged tourists.

Our hotel, Grand Hotel Stockholm, is the traditional “heart” of Nobel Week.  All the Laureates are guests here, as are about 200-250 of their guests.  In the lobby of the hotel is found the “Nobel Desk” where, upon arrival, we collected our tickets for various events, received a booklet outlining Weo’s schedule (each guest got a booklet customized for “their” Laureate), got a page describing the transportation schedule of the buses that would get us to various venues, and were able to pick up copies of the Nobel posters.  Each discipline was represented with its own poster covering the winners’ achievements and reasons for winning.  The hosts at the desk were also available to help recommend places to eat and act as concierges.  It appeared to me that these folks were working 16-18 hours every day we were present.

One of the items in our goodie bag from the Nobel Desk was this program which summarized the various activities not only of Nobel Week, but the week following.

There were actually 11 different versions of the book, each one customized for a particular winner.  We, of course, received the book for "our guy".  In particular, the events for the 2nd week were generally different for each winner as the book reflected the different schools and other places they would each visit.   

After collecting our various “goodies” we went upstairs to our connecting rooms and unpacked.  As might be expected from a luxury hotel, the rooms were…luxurious.  Lots of warm wood tones abound.  

There was a fruit plate waiting for us, but by the time we’d gotten into our room it was very late in the afternoon and we were tired, so we simply called Sharon and Weo to tell them we’d arrived and then ordered up room service dinner. Andrew had the Swedish meatballs because, come on…somebody had to!  Finally, exhausted, we turned in for the night.

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2014 Nobel Prize Part 3: An Unexpected Journey

So if anyone from my work is reading this, I’m going to make an admission.  The day that Weo won I went to work, but other than making sure I was responding to email I did nothing else work-related.  Instead, I spent the whole day doing what I imagine a lot of family members of winners do – I monitored the internet for news to see if any new details had emerged – i.e. had anyone finally found and interviewed Weo?  And I started doing research about how to be a tourist in Stockholm.

Thank you, Internet!

I knew that at least Eileen and I would want to make the trip to attend the awards ceremony.  How could we NOT be there?  Whatever it took, we were going to go.  With luck we’d be able to take the boys also.  That last bit hinged on a critical question: just how the hell do you get admitted to the Nobel Prize Awards Ceremony, and will it be open to kids?   There must be tickets – but how do you get them?  And what about the Nobel Prize Banquet that follows the awards – is that something we could consider, or was that a “closed” event?  No amount of searching for information led to anything definitive, however.

Curse you, Internet!

At this point, I’m not thinking at all about how this is likely to really work.  Not surprisingly, there are provisions for the Laureates to invite a limited number of guests to join them (more on that in future postings).  Right now, however, I’m just focused on figuring out the logistics of making our own arrangements to get to Stockholm.  I feel confident I can get us to Stockholm, find us a hotel, and plan places to tour while we kill time waiting for the awards ceremony – but how to get into the awards ceremony is still a great mystery.

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We finally come to the end of Day 1 of Hearing That Weo Has Won The Nobel Prize.  It is the late evening and Sharon and I finally have the phone call that we couldn’t have at 6AM that day due to the presence of TV cameras.  We put the call on speakerphone so we can all hear on our side.  Sharon fills us in on all the details that she can – but curiously enough at this time there STILL hasn’t been any official notification from the Nobel Committee on the award.  (I don’t know how long it took for Weo to be “officially” notified – it may have actually happened that first day, but not that Sharon knew at the time.)

A bit tentatively I tell her that we’d like to be in Stockholm to witness the awards and I’d been researching tourist stuff all day.  Sharon tells me that she imagines we can be “part of their entourage” and that we MIGHT be able to get some logistical assistance from the Nobel folks.  (I want to be Sweat Wiper and Gum Injector.)  So we now get our first inking that, if we sit tight, a lot of our confusion may be cleared up and perhaps our planning process might become vastly simplified.  Since there’s been nothing official yet, just what can be truly expected is unknown.

Except…

Sharon tells us of a book that a colleague has told her about, called “Reindeer with King Gustaf: What to Expect When Your Spouse Wins the Nobel Prize”, which was written in 2009 by the wife of another Stanford professor who won a Nobel in 1998.  (UC Berkeley likes to brag that they provide private parking slots to all their Nobel Winners.  Stanford counters that they don’t have nearly enough spaces to accommodate all of their winners.  This is what passes for trash talking in academia.  For the record, Cal currently has 8 living Laureates while Stanford has 22.)  Obviously, this book is going to be of tremendous interest to Sharon – but a Kindle copy is only $8 so we grab one and both read it the next day.

Stunning.  Amazing.  Unbelievable.  Pick any of them.  They all apply.  What this woman describes in incredible.  The experiences of the Laureate (and his wife) are almost beyond belief.  Some of those experiences will be discussed in later postings.  For now, what we learn is that both the awards ceremony and the banquet are probably firmly in our future, as well as something we can take the boys to.

With that, an exhausting, adrenaline-soaked day comes to an end…and we haven’t actually done anything like, you know, win a Nobel Prize.  Basking in the glow of someone else’s success can be tiring.

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The really interesting stuff is starting!

It is now Monday October 13, 2014, five days after the announcement.  Sharon forwards on an email sent to Weo from the Nobel Committee.  It appears that someone has finally reached out and spoken to him directly and let them know that he’s their personal contact person for planning until they arrive in Stockholm.

So this apparently isn’t the greatest prank in living memory.

The email recaps details that have been discussed, the highlights of which are:
• Heads up that the Nobel Foundation’s travel partner will soon contact them to arrange for flights for S&W, plus be available to guests if desired.
• S&W need to be in Stockholm no later than December 5.  “Nobel Week” runs Dec 6-12.  Starting Dec 13 they can expect to receive invitations from around Sweden.  They are advised to forward all invitations back to him and he’ll track things.  Most importantly, he advises them NOT to accept any invites until there’s a full picture of things.
• They can invite up to 14 guests – so they’re allowed a total party of up to 16, including themselves.   (They can actually invite more folks, but only members of the “official” entourage are eligible for invitations to things like the Award Ceremony or Banquet.)
• The Foundation will put them up at the Grand Hotel Stockholm, and guests can optionally make their own reservations there at specially negotiated rates.
• The Foundation will assist all male guests in rental of formal attire.  (The awards and banquet are white tie and tails for the men, formal gowns for the women.)
• They will be assigned a personal assistant (“Nobel Attendant”) while in Stockholm.  From the “Reindeer” book previously mentioned, we know that this is exactly what it says – one person who knows how the process works will essentially be with them all the time to keep them on schedule and grease any squeaky wheels for them.

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Tuesday October 14 – more details emerge of what we can expect for Nobel Week.

Sharon forwards a summary schedule that includes the known events, who is expected/allowed to attend, and guidelines on dress.  Below, the code LSFG is used to indicate “Laureate”, “Spouse”, “Family”, “Guests”.  And, yes, I’m going geeky by using military time.

Sat 12/6
      0940-1145 Laureate Get Together @ Nobel Musuem (L/suit, S/casual,”close family”/casual)
      1600-1700 Laureate Inteview (L/suit)
Sun 12/7
      0900-?       Nobel Press Conference (L/suit)
      ?-?         Rehearsal for Monday’s Lecture (L/unknown)
      1900-? Academy Dinner (L/suit,S/dress)
Mon 12/8
      0900-? Weo’s Nobel Lecture (All, L/suit, others casual).  This is a public event, I think.
      1845-? Nobel Concert @ Stockholm Concert Hall (L/suit,S/dress,up to 8 guests/same)
Tue 12/9
      0930-1700 Nobel Week Dialogue @ Stockholm City Conf Center – open to the public
      1800-2000 Laureate Reception @ Nordic Museum (LSFG/suits and dresses)
Wed 12/10
      1030-? Awards Rehearsal @ Concert Hall (LS/casual)
      1615-1745 Awards Ceremony @ Concert Hall (LSFG/formal – tails and gowns)
      1840-2100? Awards Banquet @ City Hall (LSFG/formal – tails and gowns)
Thu 12/11
      ? Award-related Paperwork with Nobel Foundation (LS/casual)
      1300-1600 Taping of TV program “Nobel Minds” (LS+4 guests/suits and dresses)
      1910-? Royal Banquet (LS/formal – tails and gowns)
Fri 12/12
Nothing scheduled
Sat 12/13
      1815-? Lucia Ball (LSFG) – not sure what this is yet.

Although not yet confirmed, based upon the Reindeer book we believe that “Family” = Daniel, while “Guests” = us, even though we’re family.  As it happens, that distinction doesn’t seem important right now, but it may later.  There’s some events and places that simply can’t handle all the folks there to support all the Laureates.  Plus I’m guessing that the Laureates greatly appreciate that some things are uniquely for them and their spouses – this party is for them, of course.  We’re thrilled that we’ll be allowed to share pieces of it – but we’re not here to film an episode of “Nobel Week Crashers”.  (Note to self: float this idea to The Discovery Channel.  It’s gold.)

=====

Weo has previously attended the Nobel Awards and Awards Banquet as a guest.  He was there in 2001 for the Nobel Centennial celebration.  Apparently, he managed to refrain from any horrific faux pas, which is good because you don’t want the King to remember that you dropped trou’ the last time you were in the country when he hands over the award. 

When it comes to the Awards Banquet, however, there is one thing that we’ve read in the Reindeer book that has me a bit nervous.

Apparently, the King and Queen have nothing better to do that night so they attend the banquet, too.  I’m guessing that when the King hands over the award earlier in the day to each Laureate the conversation goes something like this:

King: Congratulations, dude.  You must be hella smart.  Here’s a piece of paper and a big piece of chocolate covered in gold foil.
Laureate:  Thank you, your Majesty.
King: Hey, bro, do you know if anyone is going out later?  Me and the old lady were hoping we could tag along.
Laureate:  Um…well a couple of us were going to grab dinner….but – you know - we were hoping to keep it small….um….I’m not sure we could expand the reservations…and you’d be bored, anyway.  I’m sure you’d have more fun flogging some peasants…
King: Hey, no problemo – we won’t take up much space.  And it would be way cool to catch up.  Hey, did I ever tell you about the time in high school when I scored the winning goal against Uppsala Tech?  Those were TOTALLY AWESOME days, dude! 

So, anyway, the King will be there.  And apparently the King is a cyborg without internal plumbing, because as long as the King is in the room no one can leave.  And by “no one can leave” I mean that no one can get up to go.  You know, “Go”.  Undrink the morning juice.  Return your beer rental.  See a man about a dog.  Write your name on the wall (men only).  Get the picture?

I have two young boys.  They’ll be fine.  I’m worried about me and my rapidly ageing prostate.

=====

And now, let’s talk clothing.

I still have several suits in the closet that I haven’t worn in years.  I like wearing suits – I think they look great.  But Californians collectively decided about 15 years ago that suits were no longer appropriate.  You can’t show off your nipple rings and tats in a suit, apparently.  So my suits have hung in the closest for years.

And guess what?  When you leave a man’s suits in the closet for that long THEY GET SMALLER.  That’s clearly the ONLY reason why all the waistbands can’t be fastened and the jackets don’t button.  (When I think of all the grief teenage me gave to my then-in-his-fifties father about his pot belly…well, really, really sorry Dad!)

Thankfully, for us guys the solution is soooooo easy.  We found Andrew a nice black suit jacket at Kohl’s which we’ll marry to some pants we already have.  We then ran over to Men’s Warehouse where Robert and I both get outfitted with new suits, shirts, and ties.  Easy peasy – we’re in/out in about 45 minutes, and are now ready for any event where “suit” is called for.  We’re expecting that we’ll have to send a bunch of measurements to the Nobel Foundation for our tails and those will auto-magically show up in our hotel room in Stockholm when we need them.

Eileen and I know that, with Robert still growing, he’ll likely only wear his suit once before it won’t fit again.  However, we’ll hand it down to Andrew.  We decide we’re going to have to ask Weo to win another Nobel in five years so Andrew can wear it.

Speaking of Eileen, she of course requires new dresses and – gulp! – a formal gown.  My brother-in-law Jeff has already volunteered Lise to go shopping with Sharon who, of course, is facing the same challenges (only more so, since she is the wife of a Laureate and – who knows – might have to distract the King by showing cleavage while Weo pockets a Royal Ashtray or other souvenir).  Like our late sister Debra, Lisa is quite comfortable in this more elegant world so will no doubt give Sharon great reassurance.

Eileen is currently on her own for her clothing.  I can’t believe she didn’t think my idea was appropriate.  What’s wrong with a blouse made of recycled plastic six-pack rings and a skirt of swan feathers?  I’m embellishing.  I didn’t suggest the blouse.  Sadly, I really DID make a joke about the swan feather skirt.

=====

Another homework assignment forwarded in email by Sharon.

We have to fill out quick info with our full names (as found on our passports), our relationship to the Laureate, names of our immediate family among the other guests and how we’re related, our gender, age (just for those under 21), title, profession, email, languages spoken (Yeah, right.  As if.), and finally any food restrictions.

Although not stated, we assume that they want this data to figure out the seating chart at the Awards Banquet.  Or they are just REALLY nosey.

From the Reindeer book we know that every diner has his/her own footman standing behind him/her, waiting to place food in front of you, fill your water glass (note to self: Careful.  Remember, no trips to the bathroom while the King is in the room), pickup your napkin, and generally ensure you don’t make an ass of yourself.  (Actually, only the King has a dedicated attendant.  The rest of us have to make due with waiters at our table.)

They are also very careful to ensure that they don’t poison you with food and drink you can’t have.  I read somewhere a story of the teetotaler Laureate Richard Feynman.  At his 1965 dinner the waitress carried out two identical bottles to serve him and the King.  The King’s bottle had wine, while his bottle had water.

Any hopes I may have harbored to poison Eileen at the Banquet by slipping nuts into her food – she has a nut allergy – come crashing down.  The authorities won’t believe that the kitchen screwed it up – they have this down to such a science that slip ups like this apparently just do not happen.

=====

A digression.  Here’s what the office of a Nobel Prize winner looks like:

If your kid has a really messy room then you might have a future Nobel Prize winner on your hands.

My uncle captioned this photo: “Cleanliness and Godliness” has nothing to do with “successiness”.

=====

A little more about the Nobel Banquet.  This is apparently The Social Event of the Year in Sweden.  Invitations are prized.  Thankfully, the Laureates’ guests are given priority before the tickets are thrown open to the general public.  So we’ll be there, along with about 1,200 of our closest friends.  Apparently those who can’t attend can watch it live at home in Sweden.  I’m sure it’s riveting.  (“Honey, come watch as people we don’t know eat food.”)  Later we’ll discover that both the award ceremony and dinner were live-streamed on the internet, and several family members in the US actually watched.

As the premier event, the food is front and center.  Menus from prior years are all posted on the Nobel web site, so you can look for yourself if interested.  Earlier in the year there had been a competition among Michelin-level chefs with the winner getting the right to create and execute the menu for that year’s banquet.  For months the 45+ chefs have been testing and rehearsing, the 250+ servers have been going over their assignments, and the sommeliers have been preparing the 400 bottles of champagne and 400 bottles of red wine that will be served.  According to both Weo (who attended in 2001) and the author of the Reindeer book, 1,200 people will be served HOT Michelin Star-quality food at the same time.  Forget the Laureates – whoever figured out how to do THAT should be getting the Nobel.

And here’s also a hint that the preliminary schedule Sharon shared with us is just a tiny subset of what Nobel Week entails.  Following the Banquet (at least according to the Reindeer book) is something called the “Nobel Nightcap”, hosted each year by a different university.  This is where Laureates and guests can party with students until the wee hours.  I bet that the Literature Laureate probably spends most of his time trying to pick up chicks. (“Hey, babe.  Want to come upstairs and read my writings about ennui?”)

And now a serious moment.  The demands made on the Laureates and their spouses can potentially be crushing.  Yes, in so many ways Nobel Week is a non-stop celebration for them.  But it really IS non-stop.  They have to be CONSTANTLY “on”.  The days are apparently very long, and many of the traditions are 100+ years old. Of those things that are open for guests to attend, we can make a choice.  Daniel can make a choice.  The other guests can make choices.  But the strictures of convention and tradition basically leave Sharon and Weo no choices.  They have to attend EVERYTHING.  They have to drink with King AND student.  They have to dance in ballroom AND university basement.

Hopefully, they’ll revel in it and not want to miss out on any aspect of the experience…because they’re going to experience it whether they want to or not.
=====

Another digression.  I am amazed at how often this happens:

Me:  My brother-in-law was awarded the Nobel Prize for Chemistry.
Rube:   Hey, Martha!  This guy’s brother-in-law just got the Nobel Peace Prize!
(Or, alternately: “…just got a Nobel Peace Prize for Chemistry!”)

No, he did NOT win the Nobel Peace Prize for Chemistry (which does NOT exist), and he certainly did NOT win the Nobel Peace Prize (which IS a real award and went to Malala Yousafzai in 2014).

There are a total of 6 Nobel awards given out annually.

Five of them originated in Sweden and are awarded by Nobel Committees that are housed in Sweden.  These five are the Nobel Prizes in Physics, Chemistry, Medicine, Literature, and Economics.  Each one is called “The Nobel Prize for <blah>”.

The sixth award is the Nobel Peace Prize, which originated in Norway and whose Committee is housed in Oslo.  No doubt the Norwegians looked at the economic bonanza generated by the 150 or so guests invited by the winners to Sweden and thought “We need to get in on that action.  Just imagine how many Twizzlers we can sell to a winner’s friends if we give out a prize, too”.

The Swedish-honorees all gather in Sweden to get their awards.  The Peace Prize winner goes to Norway for a completely unrelated award ceremony.  The Swedish winners and the Peace Prize winner eventually do meet in Stockholm at the end of the week in Sweden, at which point the Swedish winners challenge the Peace Prize Winner(s) to a game of "Are YOU Smarter Than a 5th Grader, Because WE Are?" 

Some of the Swedish Nobel Winners meet the Nobel Prize winner.  They are all trying to make contact with a portkey in order to be transported to the Quidditch World Cup.  The typical Nobel Prize winner won't get this joke.

Anyway, don’t be a rube.  There’s only ONE thing called the Nobel Peace Prize, and it has nothing to do with the Noble Prize for Chemistry (or Physics, or Medicine, or Literature, or Economics).

=====

Back to our logistics.  One week after the announcement of Weo’s win, equipped with contact information for the Grand Hotel Stockholm, we book two (connecting) rooms for December.  Our plans are:
Sat Dec 6: Depart SFO
Sun Dec 7: Arrive Stockholm
Fri Dec 12: Depart Stockholm/Arrive SFO

At the time I book the rooms we don’t yet have flight reservations.  Although I’ve scoped out the flights using kayak.com I’m waiting to first hear from Scanworld, the travel partner that the Nobel Committee uses to arrange flights for the winners and allows guests to optionally use.  We assume that they don’t even have our contact info yet, so no shock that we haven’t heard from them.

And now an admission.  I decided to write this blog one week after Weo was announced as a winner.  One concern I had is that I wasn’t sure I could sustain the narrative long enough to justify setting up a blog.  [Note from 2019: I never did actually create a blog.]  So everything you have read up until this moment was actually pre-written by me on October 15 and 16.  Seeing that this is the 29th entry has given me the confidence that I had enough material to continue.

So I’m actually writing this particular entry on October 16, and I confirmed the hotel reservations just a couple of hours ago.  When I wrote the first paragraph above I also had my first “Uh oh” moment.  I just realize I’ve committed us to checking into the hotel on December 7 without actually knowing that we’ll be able to get a flight that matches our intentions.  I know it will all work out, but I’m having a nervous moment right now.  (I have already decided that if I don’t hear from Scanworld by early next week I’m just going to go ahead and book our flights on my own.  I suspect that they aren’t going to offer rates any different than those I can get myself.  I want to give them a chance to prove me wrong, but I’m not going to wait forever.)

=====

In the first week following the announcement, once we had determined that we were going to go to Stockholm, we had to consider how to handle school for the boys.

Andrew had told his 4th grade teacher the day after the announcement that his uncle had won the Nobel Prize.  Her first response: “What?  Are you serious?”  Once she realized that he was quite serious she asked him to share the news with the whole class.  Later, when Eileen mentioned to her our intent to pull Andrew out for Nobel Week she was so excited for Andrew.  Perfect!

Robert was a bit different.  He didn’t initially tell anyone at school.  “There was never a point in conversation when it seemed natural to say something”, he would tell us.  Of course, as a freshman in high school we had more concerns about how his teachers might react to our intentions to pull him out of school for a week.  So off went an email.

Most of his teachers responded within 24 hours, and all with same basic message.  The week we’re gone is review week for finals, so there’d be almost no new content to be missed.  Further, they all commented that he was a great student so they didn’t think his absence would be a problem for him.  Phew!  We were worried that at least one of them might take a hard-line position and refuse to condone his absence to the point of refusing to allow him to take work with him or make it up.

We also dodged a big bullet.  If Nobel Week and Finals Week had coincided we might have had to leave Robert home.  That would have been hugely disappointing to all of us.  Again – phew!

=====

Hard to believe, but there are some days when nothing happens even remotely related to the Nobels.

Instead, celebrating the fact that the SF Giants beat the St. Louis Cardinals last night and are advancing to the World Series for the 3 time in 5 years.

Yeah, so life is good.

=====

Another example of how life is different for Nobel Prize winners:

Sharon and Weo are having to make plans to be in Washington D.C. for a reception being given by the Swedish Ambassador to the United States at the Swedish Embassy.  There are 4 American winners this year (Weo, co-winner Eric Betzig, Medicine co-winner John O'Keefe, and Physics co-winner Shuji Nakamura).  Oh, and while they are in Washington they'll drop by and spend some time with Obama at the White House.  You know, just because they will be in the neighborhood.

Of course, some things remain remarkably the same.  At the same time all this planning is going on Sharon and I are also exchanging emails about Thanksgiving at our house.  We're trying to nail down who is making the cheesecake this year.

=====

NOTE FROM 2019:  It is here that my pre-event notes that had been intended to be serialized in blog format ended.  I had a second set of notes, written while we were in Stockholm, which formed the bulk of emails I sent home to family during the main events in Stockholm.  I’ve used those and also fleshed out those notes with our non-Nobel tourist experiences.  Since I hadn’t written down those memories at the time I’ve forgotten some of the details.  Cie la vie!


What happens next?  Tune into the next episode by selecting another page from the "2014 Nobel" menu, above.  These instructions cheerfully supplied as a public service for those who haven't won a Nobel Prize.  

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2014 Nobel Prize Part 2: He Did What, Now?

When I was a kid I watched TV.  A lot of TV.  Some might have said too much TV.  So when I turned on the news at 5:45AM on Wednesday, October 8, 2014 and saw the words “Stanford Chemistry Professor Wins Nobel Prize” crawling along the bottom of the screen I felt vindication.  TV, my friend, you’ve never let me down.

Actually, I felt rising anticipation and nervousness.  You see, a Stanford professor won the Chemistry Prize in 2013.  And another Stanford professor won the Chemistry Prize in 2012, too.  So excuse me if I say that I’ve been burned by false hopes before.  Damn you, Stanford, and your consistent excellence.  I think there may be PEDs involved here.

So I remained calm.  That means I leapt out of bed and tore downstairs in hopes of finding more information.  Go to cnn.com and quickly search the page of “Nobel Prize” – ah, a link!   Click.  Damn, this is a link to the physics winners from yesterday.  I’m so enraged I can’t see straight…oh, wait…I ran downstairs without my glasses.  No matter.  I’ll squint.  Time to google for “moerner nobel prize”.  <squint> There are matches – I think.  Click the first link.  <squint> I’m pretty sure that it says he’s won…<squint>.   Dammit!  A quick sprint back upstairs to get my glasses, then back downstairs and…BINGO!

Now, if I’d had my wits about me I would have checked email first.  My sister Sharon had sent out the news around 4AM.  But that was apparently too much thinking to expect from me at 5:45AM.

I ran back upstairs and told my wife Eileen, then woke oldest son Robert up (Actual statement: “Wakey wakey!  Oh, by the way, Uncle Weo won the Nobel Prize!  Time to shower.”) and went back downstairs to call Sharon and Weo.  I was actually a bit shocked that their phone wasn’t busy at 6:00A. Sharon picked up – obviously excited – but it turns out that Channel 2 was not only at the house but was filming at that moment.  No doubt the film of Sharon answering my call was deemed too powerful for Emmy submission.  So our conversation at that time was basically:

Me: Good morning, Mrs. Nobel Prize Winner!
Her: Thanks!  Weo isn’t even here – he’s in Brazil.
Me: Is your phone already ringing off the hook?
Her: Yes.  In fact, Channel 2 is here right now, filming as we speak…
Me: Oh, in that case, send Weo our love and I’ll talk to you later.  Bye!

Such pathos.  Really gripping stuff.  I want Christopher Walken to play me in the film adaptation.

=====

Anyone else recall this “Far Side” cartoon?  It showed a busy intersection in a town somewhere.  In the distance was a rising mushroom cloud of nuclear origin, while in the foreground the citizens of the town were rushing about screaming in panic.  On the street corner stood a dog, who had spotted another dog in a passing car and was wagging his tail in happiness, completely oblivious to the drama around him.  The point was that we all see the world through certain blinders, and we pick up on those things that catch our narrow interests.

Here are some great examples of this.  Coverage of Weo’s award from decidedly different perspectives:
• Eagle Scout wins Nobel Prize in Chemistry
• Jefferson High School claims second Nobel Prize Winner
• Radio Amateur is Among Nobel Prize in Chemistry Winners
• A Second Bassoonist Wins a Nobel Prize

Way to go, WN6I.  And holy smokes Jefferson High in San Antonio, Texas – let some other school have a chance, why don’t you?!

=====

So what’s the first substantial Nobel-related thing you do when a family member has won a Nobel Prize?  I'm talking about the period AFTER you’ve called the (absent, in this case) winner?  Well, in this day and age you blast it out on the internet, of course.  So before leaving for work on the morning of the announcement I posted the news on Facebook.

This is around 6:30AM, which is about three-and-a-half hours after the announcement in Stockholm.  What is incredible is how many news releases are already out there on the internet.  There were literally already hundreds of references out there*, some already quoting Weo – who may or may not be already doing interviews…don’t yet know at this point how looped in he is at his conference in Brazil.  Most of the quotes, though, are still from Sharon, who fielded the initial 3:00AM-ish phone call from the AP seeking comment on the award.

[*One week later, the search “moerner nobel” will yield over 108,000 matches.  This, children, is why you NEVER EVER post anything on the internet that you will later regret.  Once it is out there it is out there forever.  [Interesting side note: in 2019, this same search will yield “only” 72,900 results.  Day old bread apparently loses its luster.]

Keep in mind that the AP, with little time to prepare, had managed to find their home phone number, but at 3:00AM the mighty Nobel Committee still hadn’t yet made contact with Sharon or Weo.  They were apparently trying to call Weo’s cell phone, which was either turned off or simply not reliable in Brazil – I still don’t have the full details on this one.  So for the sake of dramatic tension let’s just assume that Weo had dropped his phone into piranha-infested waters.

I’m not the only one putting out the word on Facebook.  Daniel (Sharon and Weo’s son) has also posted.  Sharon had, of course, called him right after calling Weo – but his cell phone was on the fritz and disconnected after ringing once.  So Sharon called Stef’s (girlfriend, later fiancé, later wife) cell phone, which Daniel answered because he’d seen the caller ID on his phone and suspected it was Sharon.  He’d also apparently received a congratulatory text from a friend by now so knew what the call had to be about.

=====

So how DID Weo finally learn he’d won?  (Turns out the reason he didn't get it direct from the Nobel Committee was because he had his cell phone set to airplane mode.  Sometimes, being frugal bites you in the butt....)  Anyway, Sharon had sent him a text sometime between 3 and 4AM Pacific (6 to 7 AM in Brazil).  Obviously, he knew it was "Chemistry Announcement Day" and the fact that Sharon was texting so early in the morning made him suspicious, so he checked the internet and realized he'd won.  Sharon did finally was get through to his room at the hotel in Brazil (after some language difficulties with the front desk) and the conversation – as quoted later in different news articles, was:

Sharon: Congratulations!  You won!
Weo: What?

We may have to punch that up in editing.  I’m thinking

Sharon: Congratulations!  You won!
Weo: What?  Why is there a shaved donkey in the corner of my room?

Or

Sharon: Congratulations!  You won!
Weo: You talkin’ to me?  Are YOU talking to ME?

Sharon mentioned when we spoke later in the day that she’d heard that the announcement had been delayed a few minutes and I guessed that someone had seen the Live Blog at http://www.rsc.org/chemistryworld/2014/10/live-blog-chemistry-nobel-prize/  At 10:40am Stockholm time (in other words, around 2:40am California time) they mentioned a delay.  I suggested (and I suspect that I’m correct) that the reason for the delay was that they were still trying to reach the wayward Weo before making the public announcement.

As an aside, the 3:00A-ish call from the AP asking for reaction (i.e. the first notification that Weo has won) is just the start.  The phone at their house starts ringing constantly as soon as Sharon hangs up from the AP.  In fact, I think Sharon may have had to field 1-2 more calls before she could even begin to track Weo down.  News channels were calling her to send cameras over – they don’t care that Weo isn’t there.  They just want to report on The Moment It Happened.  If The Winner can’t be there that’s OK – they’ll film The Wife as she pours cornflakes or even talks to Her Brother.  The Beast must be fed.  All hail The Beast!

=====

In the initial hours of the announcement of Weo’s win of the Nobel Prize – trust me, typing some variation of “Weo won the Nobel Prize” does NOT get old -- when Sharon isn’t talking to Weo or the media she’s trying to wrangle him a flight home from Brazil with United.  Apparently, to get home from where he is (Recife) he first has to fly 3 hours SOUTH to Sao Paulo, layover there, then catch another flight to SFO which has yet another stop somewhere.  Total flight time is somewhere in the neighborhood of 24 hours.  Ugh.

She’s apparently agonizing over whether to upgrade him to Business Class to save wear-and-tear on his back.  Sometimes they can be too damn humble for their own good.  When we talk later we both laugh when I comment that our late sister Debra would NEVER have agonized over this decision.  (In reality, Debra wouldn’t have needed to make this decision because she would never have considered flying Economy in the first place.)  “Take the upgrade out of the Prize money”, I sagely advise.

I’m a genius at spending other people’s money.

Weo expects to be picked up at SFO by a Stanford friend.  In reality, a bunch of Stanford folks - basically all his colleagues including all his grad students and postdocs - greet him at the airport in a big limo for a joyous ride back to campus.  There had been an idea floated to have the Stanford Band and Tree at the terminal when he arrived, but that ends up not happening.  No doubt the Tree refused because Stanford wouldn’t supply red M&M and ONLY red M&Ms.  I’m sure it had to be something like that.  Damn prima donnas.

=====

What was happening for Weo in these early hours of winning?  Well, after he talked to Sharon on the room phone he turned his cell phone on, for a start.  And then discovered it wasn't really very reliable.  So most of his communications for the next few hours were computer-based. And just what came in?  Email, (missed) phone calls…and scams.

But let’s start at the beginning.  After talking to Sharon and determining that he had about 6 hours before he’d have to leave for the airport, he got up and got showered and dressed.  During this time his phone is going crazy with email and phone calls.  He then quickly packed to clear the decks for action.  Except he realizes that he’s going to be conducting interviews over Skype, so he has to go back into his luggage to grab dress shirt, jacket, and tie.  Gotta look good, even when webcasting in a tiny window.

Interview requests are coming in via email and he’s got to quickly setup his wireless connection.  Good signal is only available in a corner of the room, forcing him to wedge himself and computer in an awkward place.  (If you saw any of his interviews from that morning – such as the snippets at https://news.stanford.edu/news/2014/october/moerner-nobel-prize-100814.html - this is why they have a bit of a 60’s Batman tilt to them.)  Further, he is faced with a tough choice: open the windows, in which case the sounds of the neighborhood and beach interfere with good comms, or keep the window closed, in which case the sounds of the AC overwhelm everything.  He finally settles on windows closed, AC off...and lots of sweating.  Later in the morning the Brazilians figure out that there's a new Nobel winner at one of their hotels so they dispatch a photographer and reporter to the hotel and (thankfully) arrange for an air conditioned conference room for their interview.

CNN.  New York Times. Stanford.  Nobel web site (but still NOT the official Committee communications).  Swedish TV.  Meanwhile, messages continue to arrive.  Listen to the constant “bings” in the background of the Skype videos.  Don’t know how many arrived before he got on the airplane, but by the time he arrived back at SFO he had in excess of 1200 new emails.  Somewhere in here he also made time to fire off congratulatory notes to his two co-winners.

Among those email are some “interesting” ones.  Such as the person claiming to be the “official photographer for Noble [sic] winners.”  And several requests from people that they require a copy of Weo’s signature for various “official reasons”.  And also several requests from organizations in Sweden claiming that it is traditional that the winners speak at /their/ event.  There’s some truth to this last one – the winners ARE expected to address a Swedish High School and possibly a university, as well as embark on a speaking tour the week after the awards ceremony…but it is less than clear that any of those groups would have been soliciting their visits via email.

=====

Behind the scenes, the family is emailing like crazy as news spreads and folks chime in.  One of the best responses is from my cousin Rachel, who writes:

I went to about 20 pharmacy's and 6 grocery stores today and they were all out of Nobel prize winner cards!  Don't you think that's ridiculous for this time of year?

Hey, Hallmark - are you listening?

Other emails that make the rounds in the coming days include trading travel schedules, debating the meaning of "dark lounge suit", and inventorying the shared supply of cufflinks and shirt studs.  The planning for this trip is just a teensy bit different than most other trips.

====

Sweet story:  Sharon teaches middle school math.  Sometime during the morning, the principal makes an announcement that "Dr. Moerner's husband won the Nobel Prize today."  (Yes, Sharon also has a PhD. And since I'm writing this particular paragraph in 2019, I'll mention that - literally just yesterday - Daniel received HIS PhD.  His is in Philosophy.  As they say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.)  Later, as Sharon is walking around the school at lunch the students see her and break out into spontaneous applause.

What happens next?  Tune into the next episode by selecting another page from the "2014 Nobel" menu, above.  These instructions cheerfully supplied as a public service for those who haven't won a Nobel Prize.  

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2014 Nobel Prize Part 1: Yeah...so THAT happened...

Guess what?  Trust me - you'll never guess...

Intro written in 2019:  A note about what you are about to read.  Most of this was written in 2014, and then set aside, unfinished and unblogged.  Only recently (2019) did I unearth my notes – how they got “earthed” in the first place shall remain a mystery – and try to put them together in a semi-coherent narrative.  So any facts and figures you may read below were current as of 2014.

The first few selections from the menu (originally written before we flew to Sweden) lead to pages where the text consists of several entries that were conceived as individual blog posts, with divider lines indicating where each post would have ended.  The later menu selections- most of which were written while we were in Sweden - have a bit more narrative structure.

Apologies for the semi-random shift between present and past tense.  I’m basically too lazy to go back and make it consistent.

=====

Google the phrase “travel blog” and you’ll get over 12,500,000 matches.
Google the phrase “food blog” and you’ll get over 4,200,000 matches.
Hell, google “Barbie blog” and even there you’ll get over 70,000 matches.

Clearly, the world doesn’t need any more travel, food, or Barbie blogs.

But google the phrase “What Was It Like When Your Brother-In-Law Won the 2014 Nobel Prize in Chemistry And You Got To Go To Stockholm For the Awards Ceremony Blog” and you get a big fat goose egg.  Amazing.  Almost impossible to believe that there aren’t at least 5,000 matches for this.  And yet.

Thus was born this blog, which hopefully can serve as a way for friends, family, and others to learn about something that is likely out of reach for most of us, but is so unusual that one can’t help but be fascinated by the details.  Think of this as “Us Magazine” for the nerdy set.  Fewer pictures of starlets, more words like “nanomicroscopy” and “lutefisk”.  (Microsoft Word just underlined nanomicroscopy as a word it doesn’t know about.  C’mon, Microsoft – get with the program.)

Disclaimer: The interpretation of events herein reflect MY understanding of reality.  Some of the facts may be wrong, but they are honest reflections of what I think is/was true.  And I have no doubt there will be shifts between pure factual reporting and pure fancy.  If you don’t like that go write your own blog.  But you have to find your own Nobel Prize winner.  This one is taken.

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In 2010, a group of four experts set up a betting pool to predict the winners of that year’s Nobel Prizes.  Although they didn’t get any of the winners correct for 2010, they DID manage to name three future winners, with one of the experts correctly naming both Weo and the person who would eventually win the Economics prize in 2016.  That brilliant prognosticator was none other than Milhouse van Houten, who bested Database (who did prematurely predict the 2016 winner in Chemistry), Martin Prince, and Lisa Simpson.

Everything's coming up Milhouse!

Anyone who doesn’t know what I’m referring to can, to be blunt, eat my shorts!

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Obviously, I didn’t win anything.  The Boy Wonder and hero of this story is, of course, W.E. (Weo) Moerner, aka the guy who married my sister a long time ago.  He has spent the better part of 25 years (as of 2014) doing incomprehensible things with lasers that have nothing to do with light sabers or Pink Floyd music at the planetarium at midnight.  Of course, George Lucas popularized the idea of a light saber, which goes to show how trivially comprehensible the light saber is.  See, some guy from Hollywood thought it up and had someone else shape some Styrofoam and plastic and discarded chewing gum into something tangible and – viola! – light saber.

What Weo did with HIS laser, however, was (spoiler alert) be the first person ever – EVER! - to take a picture of a single molecule.  No special effects here – just extremely good, extremely hard science.  Oh, and taking a picture of something that small?  It wasn’t just that it’s hard to do – which it is.  The amazing thing about this is that for a couple hundred years it has been considered an immutable law of the universe that it was IMPOSSIBLE to do this.  There’s even a mathematical formula that “proved” it was impossible.  So he was the FIRST PERSON EVER TO DO SOMETHING THAT WAS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO.  They should probably have a prize to recognize people who do something like that.  Seems like a big deal.

Makes that time you mastered burping the alphabet in one breath seem a bit less momentous now, doesn’t it?

Over time, Weo (and others, including co-winner Eric Betzig) improved on the techniques for photographing those single molecules and invented a new kind of microscope – one that has such super-duper resolution that it can actually see chemical reactions happening at the molecular-level in real time.  The other co-winner (Stephan Heil) took a different path so was recognized for a different, but related achievement.

So what all these guys did is to open up entirely new ways for OTHER scientists, like biologists, biochemists, and engineers to study things in their areas of interest.  So this discovery isn’t just a stand-alone achievement.  It going to have cascade effects in TONS of other areas in the coming decades.

And just to clear up some conceptual confusion: a “photograph” in this context has nothing to do with Kodak cameras and film.  For you Millennials out there, Kodak cameras are what us dinosaurs used before cell phones to take pictures.  You didn’t take selfies in our day because film was EXPENSIVE and you didn’t waste it on pictures of yourself….or food….and certainly not on porn, since someone else had to develop the film and would see exactly what you were doing you nasty pervert!  No, in this context a photograph involves lots of lasers and (believe it or not) jellyfish goo, and lots of computers to crunch information before you end up with a picture.  There’s probably a lot of math, too.  I don’t know.  Like I said at the start, I didn’t win the Nobel Prize for this stuff – Weo did.

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BTW: Just who is this “William E. Moerner” who the Nobel people said won the award?  

Personally, I don’t know such a person.  I do know about “W.E. Moerner” who has published a ton of papers read by people who are frankly a lot smarter than me.

And I know of “Dub-ya-ee”, as friends and family from San Antonio call the guy who married my oldest sister Sharon.

I personally know “Weo”, which is the nickname he received in college from a friend, who said “I’m NOT calling you Dub-ya-ee”.  Fortunately for the world, the local grocery store chain at the time was running an ad campaign with the catchy (NOT) tagline of “Where Economy Originates”.  In a display of both ingenuity and cruelty that only good friends can get away with, he dubbed his friend “Weo” and that’s how we all know him.

So who is “William E. Moerner”?  Well, it seems that the Nobel Committee simply can’t accept that someone worthy of their recognition is really, truly, known professionally as “W.E. Moerner”.  They are insistent that he be commemorated as “William E. Moerner”, and this is final.

Coincidentally, this is the same fate that befell both “Big Al” Einstein and Mumbles Mandela.

What happens next?  Tune into the next episode by selecting another page from the "2014 Nobel" menu, above.  These instructions cheerfully supplied as a public service for those who haven't won a Nobel Prize.  

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